First Brexit, then Trump, and now everyone suddenly fears the future. Don’t be an idiot.
We used to be cavemen (and women, obviously (and perhaps even a few CaveLGBTQ+++ (but they wouldn’t have been able to breed so would have died out)))) and now we’re on the verge of robot sex slaves.
Obviously we know how to get shit done. People in the future will look back at our lifestyles and pity us for our shitty lives.
And you’re going to live your life in fear because of one old egomaniac? Don’t worry, we’ll be fine. And if you want it, you’ll be fine as well.
When I was seven I got my first taste of media-induced paranoia after reading an article about killer bees, which, sadly, never made it to my part of the world. In fact, I don’t think they ever made it out of Colombia. I think we were saved by the ice age of the late 1970s, which killed all the killer bees.
Since then it’s been an endless parade of nonsense.
Here then, is a very small sample of all the media scares I personally have survived, from A-Z
Acid Rain / Anthrax / Antibiotic Resistance
Bird Flu / Breast Implants / Bubonic Plague
Caffeine / Cell Phones / Climate Change / Communism / Crack
DDT / Deforestation / Dirty Bombs
Ecoli / Eggs
Fatty Foods / Fluoridation / Foreigners
Global Cooling / Global Warming / GMOs / Gun Control
Heroin / Homosexuality
Illegal Aliens / Isis
Killer Asteroids / Killer Bees / Killer Robots
Mad Cow Disease / Mass Extinctions / Mercury Poisoning / Meth
Nuclear War / Nuclear Winter / Nutrasweet
OIl Spills / Overpopulation / Ozone Holes
Peak Oil / Pesticides / Plastic Bags / Pollution
Rogue States / Running Out of Food / Oil / Water
SARS / Swine Flu / Street Gangs / Sugar / Super Germs
Terrorism / Tsunamis
Vaccinations & Autism / Video Games
Wage Gap / West Nile Virus
Y2K / Yellow Fever
How many of these world ending crises have affected you personally? Less than three? How many have changed the world in any perceptible way? Zero.
Basically, life goes on in all it’s glorious monotony, and will continue for the foreseeable future. Life’s a bore, and then you die.